My wife and I are a part of a small group Bible study. Somehow the discussion moved from Acts 10 to my teaching experiences (I am not sure how that happened, but I went with the change!) I was asked about working with school parents today and whether they were challenging. Honestly and thankfully, at least for me, I have very few confrontational situations with parents. The group asked why I thought this was, and I shared two reasons why I believe this to be true. As I reflected on our Bible study conversation, I realized that while I have shared these ideas with individual teachers who have asked for advice, I have never shared them with the larger education community.

I do not offer unsolicited advice to new teachers, but if they ask me for suggestions, I often share these two ideas that I have found to be true:

It’s (Probably) Not About You

When a parent expresses frustration or lodges a complaint, it’s easy to take it personally. In fact, in my first several years of teaching I took every complaint to heart and my stomach churned over it. However, I then attended a conference where a keynote speaker pointed out that so many of our parents today harbor stuggles from their childhoods that are unadressed — broken families, addications, etc. The presenter pointed out that sometimes parents are so intent on having something different for their child — they want things perfect for them — that their frustrations over their past come at us when school issues arise. You might feel like your teaching abilities are being questioned or that you’re being unfairly targeted. However, it’s important to remember that parents are often dealing with a multitude of stressors from their past and within their current situations. Obviously, it is important to discern whether their issue with you is legitimate and, if so, address it professionally, but it helped me to realize that many parent reactions are influenced by factors beyond my control.

Engage in Intentional Upfront Communication

Early in my career, I learned to take advantage of email in connecting with parents, sharing what is happening in the classroom, providing questions they can ask their student about the class, and outlining general class information. I immediately noticed that the number of phone calls to me and other questions I fielded from parents dropped drastically and that the general satisfaction of parents increased. The results became even better when I added to my calendar a reminder to periodically choose students whose parents would hear about a positive accomplishment. Anything one can do to be proactive with communication has great benefits. To use sports terminology, I would rather play offense than defense.

Teaching is a demanding profession, and it’s easy to get caught up in the daily grind. By keeping these tips in mind, one can navigate the challenges with greater confidence and create a positive impact on your students’ lives.

Image Credit: Photo by Kenny Eliason on Unsplash